The aftermath: Xena finds her ‘new normal’

I caught Xena dodging cars in a parking lot when she was about six weeks old. Because I had dogs in the van, I carried her home under my shirt. Although I saved her life, she has never been my cat; she has always been Paul’s. So now, at almost 10 years old, she’s without Paul.

Every night now, when I climb into bed, Xena plasters herself up against my feet. She’s there when I fall asleep and she’s there when I wake up.  During the day if I’m sitting in the living room, I will find her on the back of the sofa –  not touching me –  but close. Twice in the past few days she has jumped up on my desk.

Although all of these things may seem normal for most cats — and for many of our previous cats they were — these are not normal for Xena and me. She slept touching Paul, sat behind him on the sofa, and would hang out on his desk.

In her own way, Xena is telling me that she misses Paul, too. She’s not crying, not hiding, and not being overly affectionate, but she is placing herself closer to me and that’s good. I have always enjoyed her company even though she was often disdainful of mine.

Today she allowed me to rub her chin and rub behind her ears. No full-body pets have been allowed yet, though. I hope that won’t take too long.

Interestingly enough, when people were in the house these past two weeks, she would come out and visit. Normally she disappears when anyone else comes inside. She’s let my friend Kate pet her– cautiously of course — and rested on the sofa next to my 11-year-old nephew. That was totally out of character.

I’m not worried about Xena, as I am Archer. She’s eating and drinking well, hasn’t had any house-training accidents, and seems to be transitioning to me even though I wasn’t her first choice. It’s going to be interesting watching the changes, though. She’s still a feral cat in many ways so I have no idea how affectionate she may become towards me. I’ll keep you all posted.

Photo: Xena. Photo by Liz Palika

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